The "Star trek" canon concordance
Appendix II: Ferengi Rules of Acquisition
- Once you have their money, you never give it back (Zek's revision: If they want their money back, give it to them)
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- Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to
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- Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity
- Keep your ears open
- Small print leads to large risk
- Opportunity plus instinct equals profit
- Greed is eternal, Greed is eternal (Zek's revision: Greed is dead)
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- Anything worth doing is worth doing for money
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- A deal is a deal (Until a better one comes along)
- A contract is a contract is a contract - But only between Ferengi
- A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all
- Satisfaction is not guaranteed
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- Never place friendship before profit (Zek's revision: Never place profit before friendship)
- A wise man can hear profit in the wind, A wise man can hear profit in the wind
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- There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman
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- Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother (Insult something he cares about instead)
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- It never hurts to suck up to the boss
- War is good for business
- Peace is good for business
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- She can touch your lobes, but never your latinum
- Profit is its own reward
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- Never confuse wisdom with luck
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- Never trust anyone wearing a suit that's nicer than your own
- The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife
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- Never ask when you can take
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- Good customers are as rare as latinum: Treasure them
- There is no substitute for success
- Free advice is seldom cheap
- Keep your lies consistent
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- The riskier the road, the greater the profit, The riskier the road, the greater the profit
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- Win or lose, there's always Hyperian Beetle Snuff
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- Knowledge equals profit: Reg
- Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum
- Every once in a while declare peace; it confuses the hell out of your enemy
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- Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge
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- The flimsier the product, the higher the price
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- Never let the competition know what you're thinking
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- Ask not what your profits can do for you; ask what you can do for your profits
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- Females and finances don't mix
- Expand or die
- For every rule, there is an equal and opposite rule
- Enough... is never enough
- Every man has his price
- Trust is the biggest liability of all
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- Nature decays, but latinum is forever (Zek's revision: Latinum tarnishes, but family is forever)
- Sleep can interfere with...
- Faith moves mountains... of inventory
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- There is no honour in poverty
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- Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack
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- Treat people in your debt like family - Exploit them
- Never have sex with the boss' sister
- Always have sex with the boss
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- Everything is for sale, including friendship
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- Even a blind man can recognise the glow of latinum
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- You can't make a deal if you're dead
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- Wives serve; brothers inherit
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- Only fools pay retail
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- There's nothing wrong with charity... as long as it winds up in your pocket
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- Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit
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- Whisper your way to success
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- Know your enemies... but do business with them always
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- Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit
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- Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money
- Hear all; trust nothing
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- Never cheat a Klingon... unless you're sure you can get away with it
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- It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door
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- The justification of profit is profit
- New customers are like Razor-backed Greeworms - They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back
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- Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than asking the question is getting the answer
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- Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success, don't hesiTate to step on them
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- Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach
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- You can't free a Fish from water
- Always know what you're buying
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- Beware the man who doesn't make time for Oo-mox
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- Latinum lasts longer than lust
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- You can't buy fate
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- Never be afraid to mis-label a product
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- More is good... all is better
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- A spouse is a luxury... a smart accountant, a necessity
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- A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience
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- Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum
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- When in doubt, lie
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- Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi
- No good deed ever goes unpunished (Zek's revision: A good deed is its own reward)
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- (False) Neelix: Always thank the people you exploit; it will be easier to exploit them next time